Jomo Lager

Starr Hill Brewery
Charlottesville, VA (USA)
5.57 ABV

C. Cloudy definitely, with many small things foating around.

H. Burnt orange, just like the Texas Longhorns.

N. Malty, pretty much it.

**Request from JP**

Dos: Eh, nothing special about this one. This was not the first time I have gotten to experience this Starry beer, but I must say I did not enjoy it as much this time around. Maybe because the first time I drank it, it was out of the bottle and this one was in a glass? I don’t know, Maybe it’s because we have spoiled ourselves with the likes of Utopias and Dogfish beers and such. I typically tend to enjoy all of the Starr Hill’s, but this one is just average. I guess if I went to some whore house, and I had 6 ladies to choose from, it would kinda of be like if the 5 best ones were taken, and I had to settle for the 6th best. Oooo gotta love that 6th best. All in all, it’s a drinkable beer, just like I’m sure the young lady would be decent, but if I had the other ones to choose from, I’d probablyyy go with the others. Score = 3.31

Fermentation: Yummy after opening this beer I decided I needed a turkey sandwich…..why? Well this one has sorta a dill pickle attack to it. Once you get past this, Starr Hill did a good job, it is just an odd first attack. Not the first beer I have had with that as an attack. The Jomo has a clean refreshing taste to it, that is quite complex, but east to drink. This is defiantly a good beer to have with a picnic. In fact, grab your picnic basket, some of this beer, a sandwich or two, and a SEXY woman…..Good beer Score = 3.32

***NOTE, We do these reviews AND scores separately, and when we saw how close our two scores were, we just laughed. Definitely without a doubt the closest we have ever gotten.

Overall =3.315

ELePHANT Premium Beer

Carlsberg
Denmark
7.2 ABV

C. Pretty clear other than massive amounts of particles.

H. Pee yellow (the type of yellow after you take a lot of vitamins)

N. Confusing scents, smells just like any normal American type of lager (Bud, Miller, etc.)

Dos: Junk. I think we both agree that this tastes like pure saltwater. It looks like pee, tastes like salty water, why do people want to drink this? I mean I think the normal Carlsberg tastes better than this crap, and this is supposed to be the premium version? Dude, no. Two minimal sips of this beer and I was done. I don’t usually toss beer out, but this was one of those not so good ones. This monstrosity should not be consumed. Thank goodness we didn’t even pay for this beer since it was a gift. Nice gift…..lol. Score = 1.31

Fermentation: Ok, so this is a beer that is by appointment to the Royal Danish Court……FOR LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD IN BEER, STAY THERE. ELePHANT is not the normal Carlsberg which is pretty good, this is stronger in alcohol, and stronger in the taste like poo style. Not impressed in this at all, it is bland and tastes like a run of the mill lager. The only thing that is remotely cool about this beer is the bottle. Lets focus on the positive; The bottle is green, it has some cool writing on the glass, and there is a metallic elephant on the label. Back to reality, LEAVE THIS ONE ON THE SHELF! Score = 1.003

Overall = 1.1565